PHOTOS BY KRISTY GRAVER

Presley “Beepers” Bardakos leans out of her food truck and hands me my order, an imaginary hamburger piled high with lettuce, tomato, onions and pickles. I pantomime taking a bite then smile and pat my belly.

Beepers, 2, cheers while her 3-year-old sister, Charlotte, better known as “Smooch,” deep-fries some invisible spuds inside the polyester play vehicle. 

It was the best meal I’ve never had. 

The toddlers, who spend a lot of time in the kitchen with their chef-parents Joe Bardakos and Madi Donaldson, have a small but loyal following on TikTok. Even if The Smooch N Beeps Cooking Show doesn’t set the foodie world on fire, the tiny truck parked in the living room of their Reserve home is always open for business, unless, of course, the pint-sized cooks are busy watching “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.”

“I’ve never been a food snob, but I want them to know good food and how to make it. If they become chefs, that’s great. If they don’t, they’ll be accountants or doctors who make the best damn lasagna,” says Joe, who co-owns Bridge City Brinery and Bridge City Smashery, a food truck fleet that’s gearing up to open brick-and-mortar eateries in Sharpsburg and on the South Shore.

Last year, Madi debuted Home Grown Catering, aka The Catery, an Etna-based service that specializes in good, old-fashioned comfort food and charcuterie boards. The York, Pa. native picked up culinary skills from her grandmother, who made everything from scratch, right down to the jam on her freshly baked bread. 

Madi was also inspired by celebrity chef Rachael Ray and recalls rushing home from school each day to watch her syndicated talk show. Someday the small-town girl hopes to raise her own vegetables and livestock for a farm-to-table restaurant. Until then, she’s happy teaching Smooch and Beepers baking basics. The girls love making dough and are often covered in a thin layer of flour.

“When we go shopping together they pick out the ingredients,” Madi says. “We mix it in a bowl and hope it tastes good. Sometimes it’s the best!”

Joe grew up in a large Greek-Italian family in Shaler, where his mother would shoo him out of the kitchen for sampling the grub before it was ready. (He recalls eating smelts out of a deep fryer like the tiny fish were potato chips.) 

He says his banishment from the room piqued his culinary curiosity. For his seventh birthday, he received a waffle maker. Now his expertise is in fried chicken, the waffle’s southern sidekick.

During the pandemic, the former Piccolo Forno chef and his co-worker Mark Mammone started fermenting pickles and selling them under the name Bridge City Brinery. They now have a rolling smash burger joint and a mobile unit that dishes out some of the best sandwiches in the ‘burgh. 

My favorite, The Graceland, is a nod to Elvis (that’s also where Presley got her name) and a tribute to Joe’s late father, a fried chicken connoisseur and a lifelong fan of The King.

“That sandwich is definitely a labor of love,” says Joe, adding that he sings Elvis songs to his kids every night. “I get my patience from my father. It wasn’t until after he died that I got the recipe right. I think it’s the best sandwich.”

Watching Joe and Madi in the kitchen with their children was a joy, especially since they were making a real dinner for me!

The meal consisted of a monster chicken-burrata sandwich on homemade focaccia bread with a side of fries. Despite devouring a phantom hamburger moments before, I cleaned my plate in a flash. Smooch and Beepers snacked on olives and cheese doodles, a gourmet pairing if there ever was one. 

My daughter will be the first to tell you I have limited culinary skills, but I’ve learned a thing or two about cooking (and parenting) from watching The Smooch N Beeps Show.

“This winter I decided to post some videos to see what would happen,” Joe says of the TikTok channel. “Life is overwhelming. I would love for people to see this and think, ‘Oh, hey, they are making pretty legit food while raising kids.’ Maybe it’ll help somebody.”

I can attest that it did. Thankyouverymuch.