Movie Review: Next Goal Wins
The soccer comedy isn’t funny enough to separate it from a hundred similar underdog stories.
There’s a fine line between championing a group of plucky underdogs and punching down at some goofballs — and I’m not sure “Next Goal Wins” lands on the happy side of that line.
The sports comedy comes from Taiki Waititi — he directed it, he co-wrote it (with Iain Morris), and he appears in an unnecessary supporting part with some kind of ridiculous facial prosthetic.
“Next Goal Wins” adapts the true story of the American Samoan National Football team, frequently ranked as the worst in the world due to the small size of the country (and residency rules limiting who qualifies to play for the national team).
The story begins with an account of the team suffering the worst loss in international soccer history — a 31-0 pulverization at the hands of Australia — then jumps forward to the arrival of Thomas Rongen (Michael Fassbender), a disgraced Dutch coach tasked with turning the club around.
However well-intentioned, that makes “Next Goal Wins” another story about a westerner arriving at a place and teaching the locals about the world beyond. Whether or not you find this particular instance distasteful, it’s a tired story.
“Next Goal Wins” tries to make sure it’s Rongen who does the learning, teaching him (eventually) to corral his anger and educating him about the existence of trans people. (The performer Kaimana plays Jaiyah Saelua, a Samoan footballer who is faʻafafine, a third gender traditional to Samoan culture; the real Saelua is the first non-binary and trans person to compete in a World Cup qualifier.) Perhaps the real Rongen did indeed grow and learn thanks to his time in American Samoa; here, though, it feels like the expected journey of the bitter coach in a sports movie, no different than many others.
The cast is earnest and the photography is lovely; it’s also hard not to get at least nominally swept up in the hard-luck team trying to win the big game. Unfortunately, it’s simply not funny. While Waititi is responsible for a number of truly funny movies and series, the “aren’t-these-islanders-weird” humor doesn’t land here; it feels like a relic, and it’s also underwritten.
Had the humor been more developed and the story a bit less conventional, perhaps it would have distinguished “Next Goal Wins.” As it is, it’s merely a curiosity — and a somewhat uncomfortable one.
My Rating: 4/10
“Next Goal Wins” is now playing in theaters.