How to Hit a Home Run at Your Pirates Playoff Party

This loaded guacamole will be going, going, gone before the second inning. No doubt about it.

Photos by Leah Lizarondo


Pittsburgh is electric right now. Everyone is happy. Everyone is, dare I say, jolly! How can we not be? PNC Park is ablaze, the Pirates are in the playoffs and there is a 40-foot-tall rubber duck floating in the river. It’s kind of surreal.

To top it off, the weather has been incomprehensibly perfect. With all this going on, the entire population of Pittsburgh seems to have made a pilgrimage to the North Shore in the past few days. I was amazed. Where did all these people come from?! Was everyone just staying home the past 21 years?

Hey, I’m not complaining. I love all this revelry. It’s just so good to be in Pittsburgh right now.


One of the best parts of all this? Party season came early! We don’t have to wait for Halloween to kick off the holidays. It feels like the holidays already. What better reason to get together than to watch history happen?

Here’s my contribution to your next tailgate or house party: The Grand Slam Guac. The yummiest guac you’ll ever make. It’s not your everyday guac (because it’s not your everyday game we are watchin’ here, folks). We are upping our game with avocados, onions, cilantro (lots of it) and good old Tabasco.

This guac uses a little trick that I got from my friend Miranda. We’re going to run some the onion through a Microplane grater. The layers of flavors of both the chopped onions and the grated onions are amazing. And the quantity of cilantro is not a typo — this is a cilantro-lover’s guac. If you have that gene that makes you hate cilantro, you can proceed without it. But I’m not sure that’s a lucky thing to do when the game is on.



  Grand Slam Guac

Yield: Makes 4 cups



  • 3 large avocados, ripe
  • 3 tablespoons lime juice
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • ½ large red onion
  • 2 bunches cilantro
  • Tabasco, about 2 teaspoons or to taste
  • 1 bunch green onions, sliced thinly (optional)
  • 1 clove garlic, chopped very finely (optional)



1. Cut the avocado in chunks, chop the cilantro and finely chop half of the onion.

2. Place all ingredients in a bowl, except the remaining onion.

3. Grate the onion on a microplane over the bowl.

4. Mix all ingredients and mash roughly so that there are avocado chunks remaining.

5. Taste for seasoning. Serve.



Chipotle Guacamole: add one chopped chipotle chili in adobo sauce

Guacasalsa:  add 1 cup of salsa

Categories: Brazen Kitchen