Edit ModuleEdit ModuleShow Tags
Edit ModuleShow Tags

Guilty as Charged as a Nutting Enabler

If you're looking for someone to blame for the current state of the Pirates, start by looking at the mirror.

Embed from Getty Images

The Pirates have traded Cole and Cutch and, in doing so, they’ve seemingly managed to extinguish all hope for this season even before pitchers and catchers are scheduled to report to Bradenton.

That’s difficult to do, even for the Pirates.

And that makes Bob Nutting a jagoff.

That, at least, is the narrative.

But in actuality, Nutting isn’t a jagoff.

He’s a business man.

You’re the jagoff.

I’m the jagoff.

We’re all the jagoffs, because we know how Nutting operates and we annually let him get away with it.

We’re the jagoff because it’s baseball Nutting is selling –– not winning baseball, but baseball –– and we’re willingly buying.

Just as we always have.

We’re the jagoff because we appreciate the artistry of a 6-4-3 double-play.

We’re the jagoff because being at the ballpark makes it easier to remember and appreciate having a catch with dad.

We’re the jagoff because we take our sons to the game, because that’s what fathers and sons do.

We’re the jagoff because of fireworks, bobbleheads and The Great Pirogi Race.

We’re the jagoff because when your relatives who have long since moved away visit in the summertime, where else are you going to take them but the ballpark?

We’re the jagoff because you never know which night might be the night somebody flirts with a no-hitter.

We’re the jagoff because there’s nowhere on earth where a beer tastes better.

We’re the jagoff because of Memorial Day and the Fourth of July and Labor Day and the way we know in our hearts those need to be celebrated.

We’re the jagoff because, in lieu of Clemente, we settle for the Clemente Bridge.

We’re the jagoff because where else are you going to get together with the guys you played softball with for all those years and tell all of those same old stories one more time?

We’re the jagoff because it’s all worth it just to have that argument before the fact about whether Hurdle should bunt or hit away?

And to see a double stretched into a triple on pure hustle.

We’re the jagoff because it’s who we are and what we do.

The product doesn’t even have to be good.

Nutting has that figured out.

You know it, I know it and most importantly he knows it.

If you listen closely, you can almost hear him explaining his evil plan to one of his cronies.

The one that maps out how he’s going to get away with what he seemingly gets away with every season once again this season.

It’s a plan so foolproof it ought to be in a movie …


“They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it, for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers, sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the game and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces.

“People will come, Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game, it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds us of all that once was good and that could be again. Oh, people will come Ray. People will most definitely come.”

Nutting most likely sounds suspiciously like a guy who doesn’t know whether a baseball is blown up or stuffed rather than James Earl Jones when reciting in such a fashion.

But it doesn’t matter.

PNC Park isn’t a “Field of Dreams” when the Pirates take the field.

But it’s enough.

We’re the jagoff because Bob Nutting’s got us and he knows it.

See you on Opening Day.

Edit ModuleShow Tags
Edit Module

Edit ModuleShow TagsEdit ModuleShow Tags
Edit ModuleShow Tags Edit Module
Edit ModuleShow Tags

The Latest

Mobile Service To Connect Hungry Pitt Students to Free Food

PittGrub app will send folks in need to events with leftovers.

What's It Like When You Go from Laborer to Being The Boss?

Pitt's Institute for Entrepreneurial Excellence has been teaching business strategies to startups and century-old companies for 25 years.

The 400-Word Review: The Equalizer 2

An unnecessary sequel to the Denzel Washington action flick arrives for a quick beat-em-up fix.

The 400-Word Review: Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again

The sequel to the 2008 ABBA musical is far from perfect, but might have enough charm to keep you on board.

You're Going to Be Upside Down a Lot on New Kennywood Coaster

Kennywood has revealed its replacement ride for “The Log Jammer” which will be located in a new portion of the park entitled “Steelers Country.”

Restaurant Review: Poulet Bleu

Richard DeShantz steps it up with a move from Downtown to Lawrenceville and shows Pittsburgh how to make French dining fun.

Pittsburgh to Host Nation’s First Black Beer Festival

Day Bracey and Ed Bailey of Drinking Partners Podcast and Mike Potter of Black Brew Culture online magazine will bring 12 black-owned breweries to Pittsburgh in August for Fresh Fest.

Coming Clean: Why We Aren't a Green City ... Yet

Pittsburgh is no longer a smoky city, but that doesn’t mean it has cleaned up its act. Pittsburgh's air quality still ranks among the worst in the nation. What steps are being taken to reduce Pittsburgh's ongoing dependence on fossil fuels?

Ultimate Comfort Food: The Joy of Dumplings

Why our dining critic thinks dumplings might be his ultimate comfort food.

Our Seven Favorite Dumplings in Pittsburgh

Pittsburgh, of course, is best known for the pierogi. Our love of dumplings extends beyond that, however. These seven dumplings are our favorite restaurant versions of their various styles.

The Tailor's Dumpling: Kreplach

A Pittsburgh chef and his family continue to craft a family recipe with roots in Poland.

The Pittsburgh Region's Top Dentists 2018

Our annual list, which contains 376 dentists across 11 specialties, as determined by topDENTISTS.

A Weekend Mission of Mercy in Pittsburgh

More than a thousand people come to PPG Paints Arena once a year for free dental care, thanks to an ambitious, all-volunteer effort.

Jump Into the River: Open Waters Beckons Strong Swimmers

It takes a strong swimmer and the right timing to dive into the three rivers. for those up to it, the difference between the pool and open water is profound.

Pirates Are Still a Long Way From a Hollywood Ending

Despite an 8-1 winning streak going into the All-Star break, the Bucs are in desperate need of a sequel, not only to win back some credibility with fans, but also to convince their owner not to sell off more pieces of the team.